When Darkness Calls: A Personal Reflection on I’m Not Supposed to Be in the Dark

There’s an undeniable magic in the way a book can pull you in from its very first line. I knew I’m Not Supposed to Be in the Dark by H.Y. Detrick was special when I read, “The dead can’t bother me if I don’t let them in.” Sounds intriguing, right? Yet, as I turned the pages, I found myself dancing between ambivalence and delight, ultimately landing somewhere around 3.5 stars.

At first, the beginning felt like wading through thick fog; it was slow and dense. I almost set the book aside as I approached the first few chapters, casting my patience against the wall. However, that patience eventually bore fruit as I started to embrace the magical realism enveloping Aria, our protagonist. What initially felt like an extended introduction morphed into a vivid world that, through lush language, began to breathe life into Aria’s struggles and revelations.

Themes and Characters:
I’m Not Supposed to Be in the Dark explores profound themes like mental health, societal expectations, and generational conflict. Aria’s journey towards self-discovery and emotional honesty is often mirrored through her journaling, which becomes a compelling mechanism for self-reflection. It beautifully illustrates the idea that it’s okay to not be okay, a sentiment that resonates deeply in our fast-paced world.

The character dynamics, particularly between Aria and Derek, pull at your heartstrings, painting a portrait of unspoken pain and the human need for connection. Lindy and Marcus, among secondary characters, enriched the narrative with delightful quirks; I found myself genuinely fond of them, lingering on their every appearance. Their blend of distinctiveness added layers that contrasted beautifully with the heavier thematic elements of the story.

Writing Style and Pacing:
Detrick’s writing is both accessible and poetic, guiding readers through an immersive journey. However, the pacing could use some refining; the initial chapters felt laborious, especially coming fresh off a vibrant opening quote that set such high expectations. Once the plot picks up, though, it offers a compelling invitation to keep turning pages—a thrilling kind of suspense.

While the world-building shines, the ending left me a tad disillusioned. It felt rushed, as if the author wanted to tie up threads too neatly, leaving some crucial questions unanswered. I was left pondering: why Aria? Why not explore the complexities of her family ties further? These dangling threads made me wish for more depth in what became of our characters.

Conclusion:
In summary, I’m Not Supposed to Be in the Dark is a hauntingly beautiful exploration of love, loss, and the complexities of emotions. While it didn’t fully live up to the promises set by its evocative start, its exploration of real societal issues and mental health makes it a worthwhile read. For those who enjoy magical realism tinged with complexity, or for anyone seeking a narrative that intertwines self-discovery with haunting truths, this book holds potential.

Despite its flaws, I walked away feeling a hallowed appreciation for Detrick’s voice, and I’m grateful to NetGalley for the opportunity to read this thought-provoking work ahead of its publication. It’s a reminder that amidst the dark, there’s always a flicker of light waiting to be discovered.

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